Nervous Expectation.

So I'm finally in a position where I can afford to go on proper climbing trips. I live in an area with ample training facilities. There's no excuses for being weak and unfit, its all on the doorstep or in the attic. My own laziness is the only limiting factor.

Am I lazy? Sometimes... Then I got a text off Helena who had to work at 11 am the other Thursday:

“...Would you want to get out really early tomorrow and climb something in Idwal?... Would have to leave here at 6 and go do the Screen?” Well there was only one answer to that! “I can bring ropes and 6 ice screws!”

And so the plan was set. I woke at 5.30 forced down a slice of bread and some coffee and was off. We weren't the first people at the Ogwen car park, I was surprised to see others there just after half 6. Word must have been out that the ice was in! A quick walk had us at the bottom of the route and geared up for first light at 8.

I've never climbed a proper ice route before, I've also never really lead any harder that some lean III's in Scotland and backed off a really lean Vent in the Cairngorms but I was psyced. So here I was standing at the bottom of my first proper ice route and I wasn't nervous, I wasn't scared, I didn't even think too much about it. Thunk, thunk, kick, kick and I was off. Mega hooks lead most of the way. I took care on the steeper section; tap, tap, tap, make a placement, be delicate, pull! Faff in a screw. All too soon it was over.

As I sat at the top belaying up Helena, the rising sun turned the clouds a shady orange, I smiled. Everything went well. Everything felt fine. Great route in good condition, no wind and an amazing view. Maybe for once I've done enough and put in enough hours to not feel left behind. Not feel like I should have done more and not be scared for the wrong reason.

I planned this trip to France back at the end of November so there's been plenty of time for preparation. I'd like to think I've been doing that. Many hours have been spent drytooling in the quarries in all weathers, day or night. I've been running for weeks, always in darkness generally with rain and wind, accompanied by the glare of harsh LED's. I've spent a lot of time in the attic recently. Pulling hard, traversing, getting pumped, resting and getting pumped again. Cold, damp, chalky and claustrophobic sums it up. The music from Chris' old mini discs blaring; Scar Tisue, Californication, Mojo Pin, Grace....

Will it all pay off? I Hope so. The weather forecast is good, its cold in Gap.

Helena at the top of Deer Hunter. Steep walls ensure sore forearms!